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Falling Apart

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Seconds turn into minutes, hours into days and days to months, Yet the conflict in my head never ceases to exist. Is it just a hoax, I wonder. The undeniable insanity feeds on the isolation, Chasing the what-ifs and slumming through the depressant haze. The suffocating silence is not a mere physical manifestation of self, It is embracing the truth of the shredded hope, And the melancholy which the indifference and apathy offered. Stained is the soul with doubts and regrets, Watching as the last ray of the reckoning light fade away. Mind is left in tatters and body feels like a shattered mirror, As darkness continues to lurk behind, preparing to unleash hell. "Been playing pretend for a long time now, Feels like it's time to succumb to the dread", Whispered the tear as it fell, carrying the weight of all the muffled cries of anguish. All of us, mere flesh and bone. Yet divided are we, in the name of gender, race, sexual orientation and more. Where love has to be nurtured, ...

Muffled Screams

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" Muffled Screams" Unbearable numbness taunts the soul, And the jovial sentiments once lasted is now replaced with despondency. Emotions are repressed as the sob is hastily inhaled, The desperate attempt to crawl under the covers does no good to the blistering skin. No one ever hears the cries of anguish, As we draw the blinds to shut ourselves, Away from the machiavellian and deceitful world, And all the elixir of life expectations. Like a whirlwind, the misery of neglect hits, And pierces the heart with multiple daggers. Suffocated within this cluttered space, we lay Ready to be swallowed by our own melancholy. By gnawing and quivering, we stay awake the whole night. Despite the nauseating and gut-wrenching nightmares, there still is a constant throbbing of the nerves to fight the fatigue, But Alas! the searing pain is too much to endure. Dwelling in the darkness all alone, Perilous thoughts to end this hollowness rack the brain. No more agony or empty promises or no more...

Agony of Vulnerability

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Trying to stifle the agony of vulnerability, As anxiety sets in, bringing along torture, anger and sadness. With thousands of unanswered "what if", the mind seems to be racing And drowning in the deluge of emotional strain. Haunted by the impact of anxiety on a fragile heart, Exhaustion slowly creeps in and body shudders. Every breath becomes slower and anguish takes over, Losing control in the wilderness of the inflicted pain. Staying up countless nights crying over nothing, Gripping the bedsheets and popping on too many pills, With no excuse for this agitated and abhorrent behaviour, Everything around seems to be a mirage of some haunting tragedy. Hopes of socializing gets shattered, By overwhelming fear and the very nagging thought of "What if I'm not good enough?" Even when the clock ticks 3 at night, these contagious thoughts gnaw away the peace.  Tears caress down the cheeks, And the excruciating pain of being devoured by worries, claws and rips the lining...

Into the Abyss

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  A wandering soul now turned astray, As the last of light flickered in the darkness, To a place where our overwhelming emotions did betray, Beyond despair and darkness to a complete void. Drifting among the noises to find solitude and peace, We begin to venture into the unending veil of the dark, that looms around draining the beauty of living, Awfully locking the only asylum of euphoria. The cold aura revoke the plethora of thoughts, Sending shivers as the mind whirls through memories. Emanating from inside were questions that were not answered,  Of love, hate, regret, passion, anger, distress and fear. The very intellect of thinking comes to a halt, As the deception of a blissful journey and comfort falls, Struggles and loss engenders vulnerability to self, That we desperately want to break free these barricades. Once fallen, escaping seems like an impossible quest. But remember, the eerie silence and the dark hue was waiting for you, To shred the stardust from your skin, A...

Sacrifice

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  A reflection of your incredible soul, That goes beyond caring and giving of yourself, From stretchmarks in the mother's womb to battle scars in soldiers, Lies the devotion of this propitious gift called Sacrifice. To rewrite our fate with hope and laughter, When the world is in a drunken abyss of self-pity and depression, And to embrace your dreams than the words of the living dead, In itself, self-sacrifice is sacred enough. With faith, our souls are cherished with the holy flames, And the darkness sinks when the light brightens. With the most divine contemplation, we submit ourself to the Holy good, For salvation comes with the sacrifice of pure mind. From turning freedom into responsibility and compromising desires for the good of the other, The promise is made and vows declared for a dream to build and a life to share, And by pledging to cherish every moment from that day in the world and the next, An ordeal of marriage is built with the sacrifice of a hundred lit...

Insanely bonded

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"Doctor, there is an emergency. Your presence is required."  "Monitor the oxygen saturation and use the ventilator. Will be there in ten", I responded. My thinking process seems to be troubleshooting like a broken device. For the past 15minutes, I had been sitting in the couch trying to decide what to cook for dinner and now all I can think is to pull my coat and grab the car keys. I work in Bells Central Hospital for 12 hours a day which includes the In-patient and Out-patient care along with emergency night duties. It's only a 10 minutes drive from my flat to the hospital but it would seem like infinity. I rush to my garage and before I ignite the engine, I let Zach and Amber know that I'm heading out. "Duty calls. Heading out." "You got it, kid". Typical Amber! No one ever calls me kid other than her. I'm 27 and probably look like an old soul in a young body. Amber is my gorgeous elder sister. No siblings call each other gorgeous b...

Grinding poverty

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Have a look at these young souls. They seem to be haunted by the very spectre of tomorrow. The grinding poverty outside, Leaves them with no choice other than to toil and borrow. No precious possessions to call as their own, No food, no shoes, not even a safe shelter. The grinding poverty outside, Makes them least bothered about the absence of smartphones and gadgets. Opened to great suffering and pain, Their skinny body gets frowned upon. The grinding poverty outside, Rendered them helpless as their babies groan and sigh. Wakes up in the middle of the night, Because of their grumbling hunger. Alas! The grinding poverty within, Sets them back to sleep under the ramshackle roof. Breathes of despair fills their body, Just like those tears of their fight for survival in their eyes. The grinding poverty outside, Have made them taste misery in all flavours. Plague, poison and pestilence, Became the predator for the most vulnerable. The grinding poverty outside...